[Trigger warnings: grief; suicide] One of my oldest and dearest friends, who has endured an awful amount of both physical and emotional pain, once stated that people take their own life when the pain (physical or emotional) becomes too intense to endure. That’s probably what brought us close at the beginning, when we met, twoContinue reading “Time to sit with this pain, again”
Tag Archives: healing
My full moon hike
For a large part of my life, I’ve enjoyed doing fun and/or adventurous activities on nights with the full moon: sailing, skiing, swimming in the sea back Europe, hiking, or long walks at the beach along the ocean in California. Since moving to Colorado I had only gone for a few full moon walks inContinue reading “My full moon hike”
The mountain is me
“ I’ve become A figment of my imagination That’s why I run Towards self-love and inner restoration ” “I like the person I’ve become”. The thought curses through my head, all of a sudden, almost startling me, as I’m sitting at the table, eating my breakfast cereal, tears streaming down my cheeks and Chance Peña’sContinue reading “The mountain is me”
“It is what it is”
[Trigger warnings: death, loss, grief.] “ […] We’re lost and no-one wants to feel like that We’ll find a way we can work this out But it is what it is right now I don’t have the words to make this right Or a way to fix it all tonight I know right now, itContinue reading ““It is what it is””
Turn of the Year of Healing
The last day of 2025. The last day of this momentous year for me. A hard year that started with me recovering from a double procedure surgery that was also a political act. A year that started with forced healing and continued with deep emotional healing despite, or precisely through, all the hardships: fatigue, (autistic)Continue reading “Turn of the Year of Healing”
Love catches us by surprise, again and again
[Spoiler alert: some details & a quote from the book “A man called Ove” by Fredrik Backman.] In the beautiful book “A man called Ove” by Fredrik Backman, when Ove ends up in the hospital and one of his neighbors goes to check on him, she finds herself suddenly overwhelmed by her concern for OveContinue reading “Love catches us by surprise, again and again”
Healing from the blinding pain
Pain can be blinding. For me, pain often shows up or expresses itself as anger, and anger can easily blind us or make us “see red”. But pain remains blinding for me even once the anger has blown off. As long as the wounds are there, unhealed, I cannot see the full picture, I cannotContinue reading “Healing from the blinding pain”
2025, thus far: a year of healing
Summarizing in just a few words my reflections from yesterday on what this year has been, or brought me, so far, I’d say it’s been a year of healing. Starting with the physical and emotional healing from the salpingectomy & uterine ablation that I had in December 2024. Healing from the aborted friendship with benefitsContinue reading “2025, thus far: a year of healing”
Hanging heartbreaks
Why does every new heartbreak trigger, or re-open, all of the old ones? I need to learn to get closure and/or repair together with the person(s) involved in the breakup(s) with me. I think this is my biggest mistake, or weakness, when it comes to relationships ending. My anger — that has been a faithfulContinue reading “Hanging heartbreaks”
Precious weekend
I can use many words to describe this weekend retreat with the gay men’s chorus: fun, playful, interesting, tiring, long, intense, healing, liberating, powerful, wonderful. And they’d all be appropriate. But if I had to pick just one word to describe it, I would choose precious. This weekend retreat with the gay men’s chorus to meContinue reading “Precious weekend”
The Little Prince and the Fox 