It’s mid-summer. After almost a year of paperwork and emailing back & forth with the Italian Consulate in Chicago and the City Hall of the city where I was born back in Europe, I have finally received the communication that I didn’t dare hope for: “Your sex change has been accepted and your gender amendedContinue reading “Explorative, affirming birthday week”
Author Archives: adventurerliberated
Living “The Rock Warrior’s Way”
“[…] your highest goal is learning, and only in action does true, experiential learning occur. This is what you climb for. In order to transcend a risk, you need to learn something, and you’ll only be able to learn by staying open and receptive. In your preparation for the risk, you’ve meticulously set specific parametersContinue reading “Living “The Rock Warrior’s Way””
Something new
My several moves from one city to another, between 2005 – 2013, in Europe. My move from Europe to California in 2016. Making a big career decision and starting to teach at university in California in 2018. My move from California to Colorado in 2022. My top surgery in 2023. My father’s death in 2023.Continue reading “Something new”
Ripping off the bandaid
Of course this is painful. Of course I’m feeling uncomfortable and even somewhat dysregulated. This is a loss, yet another loss. I have decided to quit the gay men’s chorus. I will have to grieve this. But what is “this” exactly? My identity as “gay man”, or my “wish to be accepted as a gayContinue reading “Ripping off the bandaid”
Free from denial — Free to love
The next-to-last night of my camping trip in South Dakota at the end of August was beautifully clear. I was going for an evening walk in the meadow that occupied a big portion of the campground and was, at the end of the season, completely empty. It was dusk, the sky darkening gradually over theContinue reading “Free from denial — Free to love”
“Acceptance is the answer”
Acceptance is the answer is tattooed on the forearm of one of the gay men in the chorus where I sing. I’ve seen and heard quotes along similar lines before and often considered them trite or defeatist. But I think I’ve finally come to understand — once again, not just rationally but also, and especially,Continue reading ““Acceptance is the answer””
The little things we remember
[Content warnings: loss, grief, death.] Often, it’s the small things we remember about the ones we loved and lost. The color and shape of their eyes. The sound of their laugh. The inflection of their voice as they told us they love us. “Ich liebe dich”, A. said suddenly, almost bluntly, matter-of-factly, for the firstContinue reading “The little things we remember”
“Maine”
[Content warnings: loss, grief, death.] Often, my favorite songs remind me of beloved persons or meaningful places or memorable experiences. I’ve never been to Maine. I have no connection to Maine, nor does my European queer ex-lover. Yet, Noah Kahan’s song Maine for some reason makes me think of my European queer ex-lover. Maybe it’sContinue reading ““Maine””
“MAGA’s Bulldog”
Some scary, concerning facts about the government and some terrible quotes from Vought [from the New York Times article: “The man behind Trump’s push for an all-powerful presidency”]: “ To many legal experts, Mr. Vought’s work is a threat to the foundations of democracy. “One of the main sources of power that Congress has overContinue reading ““MAGA’s Bulldog””
Love catches us by surprise, again and again
[Spoiler alert: some details & a quote from the book “A man called Ove” by Fredrik Backman.] In the beautiful book “A man called Ove” by Fredrik Backman, when Ove ends up in the hospital and one of his neighbors goes to check on him, she finds herself suddenly overwhelmed by her concern for OveContinue reading “Love catches us by surprise, again and again”
The Little Prince and the Fox 