Category Archives: Uncategorized

As much as I love coastal California — an area of the world where I spent the past six years of my life by my own choice, because I wanted to live there so badly — it feels so refreshing to be away from there!  I hate generalizing and I usually avoid doing it andContinue reading “On the Road: Day Three”

Two days and nearly 800 miles of travel and I can already feel the benefits of this move, the “high” from being on the road.  Leaving the place where I spent the past 4-5 years of my life yesterday felt like I was tearing myself away almost against my will and for the first fewContinue reading “On the Road: Day Two”

My place is almost completely empty now, after having taken most of my stuff to a storage unit yesterday and to Goodwill today.  It feels weirdly fun and liberating to live in such a minimalistic way…  Just a couple more nights here… I’ve been sleeping with the shades on my windows open to enjoy thisContinue reading “More Goodbyes…”

Yesterday I had a wonderful day — perfect for “my anniversary of liberation”: the right amount of packing and organizing for my move, with feelings of satisfaction and eagerness to go; a wonderful long run on my favorite trail with absolutely gorgeous weather and beautiful views; dinner with a friend (& some help from himContinue reading “Emotional roller-coaster”

“Six years ago, hope was nothing much  Waking up to a stranger’s touch  I gave up a lot just to be free But my good friends hung on to me” Today is what I call the “anniversary of my liberation”: six years ago, I got on a plane with two suitcases (and a few boxesContinue reading “Anniversary of my liberation”

But also, I am leaving here because I have the wonderful opportunity to spend a few months in a beautiful place that I love, living rent-free with friends (instead of alone and feeling lonely as I do here) while also having plenty of space & time for myself.  That’s hard to beat!  So as scaryContinue reading “…but also…”

Why am I leaving here?  This question has been popping into my mind quite often in the past few days.  The nice, sunny & mild weather, the gorgeous sunsets over the ocean and the walks at the beach; the ocean in the full moon — and being able to enjoy most of these with friendsContinue reading “Why am I leaving?”

There’s a song by Bruce Springsteen called “The long goodbye”. This is one of the few songs whose lyrics I don’t know — I cannot even remember the topic of it. But I can hear the music in my head and the title resonates with my feelings in this moment.  This is maybe the hardestContinue reading ““The long goodbye””

Sunset. For the remainder of today I’m going to relax and celebrate in a quiet, cozy way.  So much has happened in the past two or three weeks. Several intense and extremely painful incidents that reopened old wounds and/or triggered trauma. But in the end also — and probably especially — positive outcomes. Several importantContinue reading “Afraid of being happy?”

This morning, my friend’s image of “sproutiness” is more vivid and appropriate than ever. And what makes it even lovelier is that today it’s connected not only to myself but also to this person I’ve been getting close with in the past five months or so: the non-binary climbing buddy who’s become a very dearContinue reading “… this is how…!”