Category Archives: Uncategorized

Sold the cupboard a couple days ago. Started packing boxes yesterday. So liberating!  Just sold my bicycle this morning — bittersweet feelings for that…  My swimmer/artist friend said they sense a “sproutiness” in me at the moment, like I’m “a seed starting to grow sprouts” — I love this image and believe it captures myContinue reading “Hope: Change on the horizon”

OK, I’m done.  This is not simply a “New Year’s resolution”, it’s a “New Life resolution”, very appropriately coming when I’m getting ready to move out of California and try Colorado.  A few good friends of mine have more than once told me, “You’re awesome”, “You’re a super cool person”, “You are a diamond andContinue reading “New Life resolution”

“[…] work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do, and play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do” [“The adventures of Tom Sawyer” by Mark Twain] I believe there’s great truth in this statement — at least, it often feels like that to me.   Play, or fun, particularly shared fun/play,Continue reading “The lost fun”

For the first time in a long while, this morning I recognized the person in my bed. I finally felt like my good old self again: that person who wakes up feeling happy and hopeful, looking forward to the day ahead of them, no matter what negative thoughts they might have had the previous night;Continue reading “Good morning!”

Yesterday’s NPR “All things considered” edition seemed a little more varied that the usual deluge of “bad/negative news”, so I’m going to share some of the news-clips that gave me some hope and/or diversion last night. Let’s talk about abortion… really!  https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2021/12/17/1058106595/a-new-way-to-talk-about-abortion-in-maine-using-deep-conversation-to-reach-voter Amid the seemingly apocalyptic news on COVID, two positive, hopeful reports:  1) EquityContinue reading “Interesting news-clips from Jan. 4th”

An image haunts me A face  A skull A madness in those eyes calling out Or is it just my imagination? Obsession A hand taking hold of me   from unfathomable depths  A darkness inside those eyes And yet a light so bright and blinding Windows into the soul soft, clear blue And behind them, shadowsContinue reading ““Obsession””

Song: “Records” by Lilly Hiatt (slightly modified) “ I’m 40, I feel 23 Got no husband thanks to me I just wanna rock’n’roll Scream out my lungs and bury the soul I’m often lonely but I’m also free It’s never how I thought it’d be  But that record waited up for me That record waitedContinue reading ““Desire doesn’t know it’s wrong””

The first day of 2022 has been graced with gorgeous weather in this part of California: warm & sunny, and hardly any wind.  I started this New Year alone last night, which was extremely sad for me.  But today, also thanks to the wonderful weather, I’ve been able to transform some of that painful lonelinessContinue reading “From loneliness to solitude”

There’s a saying in Italian, “Meglio soli che malaccompagnati”, which means, “We’re better off alone than in the wrong (or bad) company”.  I agree with this saying. But I’ve been so alone for so long, and I’ve been feeling so lonely for so long, that I’m beginning to think, “Better off dead than so alone/lonely”.

This morning I woke up happy. One factor is the sunshine, for sure, as well as having been able to get the right amount of satisfying exercise yesterday, on the first sunny day in weeks.  But there’s also something deeper: I love New Year’s! I love the symbolism around shedding and leaving behind what weContinue reading “Turn of the year(s)”